


Pedestals

by shaylturner



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst, Gen, Identity Reveal, Miraculous Ladybug - Freeform, Reveal Fic, Tumblr Prompt, secondary djwifi, slighty older characters, thescuttlebugg tumblr prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-17
Updated: 2017-01-30
Packaged: 2018-09-09 05:11:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8877319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shaylturner/pseuds/shaylturner
Summary: "It wasn't supposed to happen like this. Adrien would be lying he said he never imagined finding out who Ladybug was. It had always happened dramatically after a battle, or maybe romantically on the top of the Eiffel Tower or Notre Dame. But it was always supposed to be to Chat Noir. Never to Adrien."Marinette reveals herself as Ladybug to Nino, Alya, and Adrien before she does Chat Noir.--cross-posted on ff.net





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [thescuttlebugg](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thescuttlebugg/gifts).



> Inspired by this tumblr prompt by thescuttlebugg: http://thescuttlebugg.tumblr.com/post/153808751691/alright-ive-run-into-some-revealfic-that-has

They were all laughing on the floor in her room. Nino laying down, head propped up in Alya’s lap as she sat with her back against a pile of blankets. Adrien sitting cross-legged next to them. All three of them laughing at a joke Nino had just spouted. She hadn't heard it over the roaring of her heartbeat in her ears. She knew she was working herself up into a panic attack, but she still struggled trying to reign in her breathing. Marinette felt a soft press against her chest where Tikki was nestled away in her jacket pocket.

On wobbling legs, Marinette rose from her chair. She crossed her arms over her stomach, her shoulders unconsciously drawing up in an effort to make herself smaller. For a few moments, she just stood there, chewing on her lip as anxiety gripped her heart tighter. She could still back out of this; she could so easily just sit back down and pretend that she had only invited her three closest friends over to hang out. But that was a lie. They were here for a reason, even if they didn't know what it was. As if the small kwami could hear the turmoil her charge was working herself into, there was another firm press against her breast pocket.

They had spoken about this. Tikki thoughtfully listening as Marinette had panic attacks and stumbled over lies, when the young teen had woken up from nightmares of Alya and her other friends finally having enough of her half-assed lies. Of her waking up one day alone. The stress was eating her charge alive and the kwami was actually the first to bring up telling them. At first, the young hero was against the idea; secret identities were secret for a reason. But what hero truly had no one else know?

She had chosen her three best friends. Her parents, she thought, would simply balk at the idea of their precious child jumping across rooftops in the middle of the night. For a couple days she had thought it might be nice to tell a teacher, so that she could maybe salvage her academic life from crumbling to pieces, but then decided only one teacher couldn't do and she didn't want to tell too many people. Besides, she figured that would only guarantee her parents finding out. So she had chosen them. The three laughing teens who were currently working themselves into tears over what was, in all likelihood knowing Nino, a meme.

It was Adrien who sobered from his laughter first. He saw her standing there, posture defensive, and his face dropped any traces of humor. Alya caught this and followed his gaze to her best friend, quickly becoming concerned. She slapped Nino’s arm, shutting him up because, despite how much she liked the boy, he couldn't read the damn room for his life. And with the sudden silence, Marinette found herself unable to back out anymore. They knew something was wrong. She couldn't lie well enough to soothe their concern. This was it.

“Marinette? What's going on, girl?” Alya asked, brushing her boyfriend into a sitting position and standing. The brunette slowly stepped towards the other girl. “Are you okay?”

She was shaking, trembling. Tightening her grip on her elbows, she pulled her arms tighter across her stomach. Her eyes were glued to her feet. “I… I need to…” Her voice caught and she swallowed thickly. There was more comforting pressing against her chest. “I need to show you something. But you can't ask questions. And you can't tell _anyone_.” She lifted her eyes to see three very concerned faces.

“Mari?” Alya said, stepping closer, placing a hand on her taunt arm. “What the hell, girl? Don't say scary stuff like that. What's going on?”

Marinette clenched her jaw and pulled back a little. “Just… just watch,” she whispered. She turned around so they wouldn't see Tikki--they had decided they didn't know _how_ it happened. In silent agreement and flash of pink, Marinette turned into Ladybug.

She turned for a moment, meeting the gazes of shock. Not even sure if she was still breathing, she turned, dropping the transformation and allowed Tikki to return to the pocket before meeting what was sure to be the explosive reaction, her only comfort being the magic being pressing against her chest, a constant warmth and pressure against her heart.

Three shocked faces, white with equal parts confusion and disbelief. She supposed this was natural. Marinette was hard to see as Ladybug, after all. She wasn't as pretty and nowhere near as graceful. After a few more moments of silence, her broken whisper shattered the stillness. “I'm Ladybug.”

In the moment after those words, several things happened. Nino’s phone fell from his hand and landed on the carpet with a dull thud as he leaned back against the pile of blankets, putting his head in his hands; Alya covered her mouth with her hand and she closed her eyes, stumbling back a couple steps before standing still; Adrien turned pale and he gripped his thighs until his knuckles were also white. And Marinette just stood there, shaking, breath caught in her lungs, waiting.

Nino finished processing first. He sat up straighter and shook his head. “This explains so much.” The boy stared at her for a few moments before abruptly standing. Part of her panicked for a moment when he started walking. Was he going to leave? Then he was in front of her, pulling her into a hug. “Breathe, Mari; don't forget to breathe.” Suddenly a shuddering sob fled her mouth and she held onto him. She stepped back after a few moments and he smiled softly at her.

The sound of Alya throwing her phone onto the pile of blankets drew their attention away from each other. The brunette looked like a mess. A thousand emotions crossing her face. “How did I not see it?” she asked quietly. “You were right there the entire time. You lied to me on a daily basis. How did I not--” She breathed out sharply and brought a clenched fist to her mouth as she bit her knuckle. “I wanted to expose you! I could have put you in so much danger, Mari!”

Nino side stepped just in time as Alya flew to the hero and pulled her into a tight hug. The two girls hugged each other tightly before Alya yanked Nino back in. “I'm sorry,” Marinette whispered, eyes wet. “I've been lying to all of you for a long time. I'm so sorry.”

Alya shushed her. “Don't. It's okay. It's okay. You had to. God, you've been doing all of this by yourself for a long time.”

They held each other for a couple minutes before they pulled back with wet laughs, Alya and Marinette rubbing wet mascara from each other’s eyes. There were a few more tearful giggles and one more quick hug before Marinette saw Adrien still sitting there, a haunted look on his face. Suddenly her stomach twisted. She bit her lip and stepped towards him a little. “Adrien…?”

His head snapped up and he stared at her with wide green eyes. Her throat started tightening again and she bit her lip harder to try to keep herself from panicking too much. She felt Nino and Alya standing close behind her and felt Tikki faithfully pressing against her chest and tried to take comfort from it. “I'm… I'm sorry,” she told him softly.

For a moment, his face clouded, then a bright smile filled his face. “Marinette, you're _amazing_!” he enthused, standing. “Don't be sorry! You're a _hero_!” He walked over to her and gave her shoulder a comforting squeeze. “Thank you for saving us all the time. You're amazing!”

She let out a shuddering breath and smiled. “It's not just me out there,” she reminded him softly. “I'm just one half of amazing.”

* * *

 

It wasn't supposed to happen like this. Adrien would be lying if he said he never imagined finding out who Ladybug was. In his imagination, it had always happened dramatically after a battle, or maybe romantically on the top of the Eiffel Tower or Notre Dame. But it was always supposed to be to Chat Noir. Never to Adrien.

Yet, this is where he found himself, sitting in Marinette’s room just barely an hour after she _transformed into Ladybug_ in front of him, Nino, and Alya.

What was he supposed to do? His Lady, a princess he had once saved as her black knight in leather armor, a sweet baker, a talented designer, his good friend all rolled into one. Any other time, the information would have made him happy. Marinette was perfect. She was everything Ladybug was, yet so different. It was like he had just watched two halves come together to complete a whole human in front of his eyes. Any other time he would have marveled at her.

But this was _wrong. It was all wrong._

It wasn't supposed to be Adrien. Why was it _Adrien_? Why _Nino and Alya_? Why _anyone_ but _Chat_?

He was watching the three of them. Laughing a little, eyes still wet from the reveal, but he couldn't even find it in himself to pretend he was okay. He was falling apart inside. He _couldn't breathe_. He felt like the very fabric his world had rested on was being ripped in half inside of his heart. He could vaguely feel the worried petting Plagg was doing against his neck, the kwami desperately trying to comfort him without being able to say anything.

Adrien felt sick. Marinette could barely speak to him. He was a model with international status. Nino couldn't keep a secret for more than a day and Alya-- _Alya ran the Ladyblog_! How could Ladybug trust any of them not to tell more than she trusted Chat Noir, her faithful partner? There was no one he trusted more than Ladybug-- _Marinette_. How could she ever trust them more than _him_?

Part of him felt guilty thinking like this. He knew Nino wouldn't tell anyone and Alya would reign back her blogging and merciless investigating. She would never tell a soul she found out who Ladybug was and, if Adrien was honest with himself, even though he had never _thought_ of telling Marinette he was Chat Noir, despite the awkwardness in their budding friendship, even before he knew she was _Ladybug_ , he knew she would have kept the secret.

Despite all of this, he would never had told anyone but Ladybug first. He had never thought of telling anyone but Ladybug before. It would make his life infinitely easier if her told Nathalie, or even some of his instructors. Telling his friends would have also released him for the obligatory guilt he felt when he had to ditch plans to save Paris, but, even though he knew all of this, he never even entertained the idea of telling anyone but Ladybug.

It just hit him in the stomach again, and he felt winded for a moment, struggling to _breathe when everything he thought he knew was destroyed_. Was he not good enough for her as Chat? God, he tried. He tried to be enough, to be perfect in helping her save Paris. He had never felt like he was enough as Adrien, the model son, and for a long time Ladybug had made him feel like he was everything she could ever need from a partner. Had he just been seeing things he desperately wanted? There was more worried petting, harder, warmer this time from Plagg.

Adrien suddenly wanted to leave. He wished he would be called for a photo shoot. He wanted to _get out_. But he knew no word would come until late evening for him to return home. Nathalie had spun a lie about Adrien being in a group project that needed to work all day today to his father to give him the ability to hang out with his friends. At the time, he had been thankful for the much needed break, but, now, he wished it hadn’t happened.

He was about to sprout a lie, grab his phone and pretend he had gotten a message. It wouldn’t be too far-fetched a story for his friends to believe, right? Then, just as he started to reach for his phone in his pocket, Nino’s words stopped him in his tracks.

“Marinette,” Nino started, adjusting his glasses nervously, “I know you said we couldn’t ask questions--and I don’t want to betray your trust and pry I… I just--why now?” He looked up to where Marinette sat on her chair near them. “Why did you tell us now?”

Why did you tell _us_? He wanted to add, but he bit his tongue and clutched tightly to his knees as he watched Marinette, God, as he watched _Ladybug_ look down and squirm a little under their gazes. God, Ladybug was _Marinette_. She sat behind him every day. She stuttered when she spoke to him, tripped on thin air, created art out of nothing, and made people smile without an effort. No one could have made a better Ladybug; how hadn’t he seen it before? The same blue eyes, the same bright smile, he had seen the same confidence when she stood up against Chloé, and she had the _same fucking hair, how could he had not seen it_?

His emotions were scattered. One moment he was in awe that she had been with him the entire time, the two of them having been drawn together even in their civilian lives; the next moment his entire world was being torn apart because she hadn’t _trusted him to know who she is_.

After a minute of silence, Marinette finally spoke up. “I talked about it for a long time with a… friend of mine. They thought it was best if someone besides me knew,” she finally said in a small voice. _A friend?_ Was there _another_ person who knew her identity before she felt she could trust _Chat_? His heart was slamming against his ribs as his eyes stung. He clenched his jaw and dug his fingers into his knees. There was more frantic petting and even a murmured purr against the back of his neck from Plagg to try to soothe his distress.

Nino nodded. “Oh, so Chat Noir is okay---”

With a small frown Marinette shook her head. “No, it wasn’t Chat. It’s… a friend; she’s like a guide I was given with my powers,” she explained vaguely. _A guide?_ It was her _kwami_ who said it was okay for her to tell people other than _him_? He could feel Plagg’s equal surprise because his gentle purr had faltered for a moment before resuming.

Nino, having felt that he was pushing too much, just nodded, looking away for a second. “But _why_ did you tell us?” Again, Adrien pushed down the need to correct the emphasis and ask why she had told _them_.

There was more silence and Adrien could only stare at her, dozens of memories and facts sliding together to paint an entire picture of a beautiful girl he had considered his best friend but now, as his stomach jerked and rolled with betrayal, he began to question himself.

“It was too much.” Her voice was broken and part of him cried out because his Lady was in pain, but so was he and he needed answers. “I couldn’t do it anymore. I was--I was lying to my best friends, my teachers, my parents--and I-I just…” Marinette stopped and rubbed at her eyes. “I was having nightmares and panic attacks and I _can’t do this alone anymore_.”

 _Do you think this is easy for me?_ He wanted to scream at her. _Do you not think I feel the same way? I’m living two lives of lies. I can’t breathe with all this responsibility. Don’t you think I want help too?_ Instead, Adrien clenched his jaw tighter and breathed out unsteadily through his nose, closing his eyes to hold back the stinging in his eyes.

“Wait,” Alya said suddenly, making Adrien look at her. Her face was twisted in confusion. “Wait, did you say _alone_? So Chat Noir doesn’t… he doesn’t _know_ ?” His heart twisted violent because even the _reporter who wanted to out them to the world_ knew this was wrong--for them to know before he did.

Marinette had the decency to look ashamed, he supposed. She looked steadily down at her feet and wouldn’t meet their wondering gazes. “No,” she said, her voice barely even a whisper. “I haven’t told Chat.” The girl looked towards her balcony and bit her lip. “Chat doesn’t know who I am or that I was going to tell anyone.”

“Why?” he blurted. She turned to look at him and he tried to reign back his hurt to try to portray natural curiosity when that was _the furthest thing he felt_. He felt betrayed and lied to. He felt like everything he thought they had been through and shared was nothing to her anymore. “Why didn’t you tell him?”

Her eyebrows drew up and she chewed on her bottom lip. “You don’t understand.. I can’t tell him…” She crossed her arms around her stomach slid down a little in her chair. “I… I _can’t_ tell Chat…”

“Why not?” Adrien could feel the sharp edge in his voice and couldn’t even try to hold it back. “Why can’t you tell him? Do you not… Do you not trust him?” His voice fell into a quiet, broken whisper and he breathed softly, trying to gain a handle on himself.

Marinette’s eyes flashed and she shook her head. “No! It’s not that!” Her voice was shaking and thickly wet. She squeezed her eyes shut and she clasped her hands together in her lap tightly. “No, I trust Chat more than _anyone_. I trust Chat more than anyone in my life, including you guys.”

“Then _why_?” he asked, voice broken. He could feel Nino and Alya staring at him, but Marinette was caught up in her own pain. “Why won’t you tell him?”

There was palpable silence. He watched as she toyed with her earrings--her _Miraculous_ earrings. Ladybug was right in front of him and she couldn’t even talk to him. She couldn’t find it in herself to even _tell him who she was_.

“I don’t trust myself,” she finally whispered. “I don’t trust myself to be _enough_ for him.”

Adrien’s breath caught in his throat. “Wait, what?” Nino asked, eyes snapping to her. “What do you mean not enough? You’re _Ladybug_.”

She sniffled and scrubbed at her eyes. “No, I’m not,” she told them, “ _I’m_ not Ladybug. The powers are Ladybug. Chat Noir fucking _idolizes_ Ladybug. And I’m just…” She threw her hands out to gesture at herself. “I’m just _Marinette_.” She sat up higher in her chair. “Chat--he trusts Ladybug with his life, he tells me every day that he does. He thinks I can do no wrong and that I’m perfect. How fucking _crushed_ do you think he’ll be when I show him who I am and he sees I’m _just Marinette_?”

He just stared at her, heart slamming uncontrollably against his chest. What-- _what was she even saying_? Marinette sniffed hard and used the sleeve of her jacket to dry her cheeks. “I trip on thin air, I have terrible luck, I literally have the worst fucking case of verbal diarrhea in the world. I’m--I’m not superhero material. I’m just a clumsy baker’s daughter, guys. I’m--I can’t _fucking compete this stupid pedestal everyone puts me on and I hate not being perfect enough_.”

The three friends just stared at her as she balled her hands into fists and pressed them into her eyes.

“Why us?” Alya asked in a quiet voice, after they had sat in silence. “I put Ladybug on that pedestal. I _cherished_ you. Adrien’s one of your biggest fanboys; I just--why would you tell us?”

Marinette smiled bitterly and sniffled. “Because you loved Marinette the way she was. You like the bad things about me and… And I’ve always felt that if you three had to choose between saving Marinette and Ladybug, you’d choose me.”

Adrien felt sick. He felt like he was going to genuinely throw up. Everything his father had made him felt--he had pushed that onto his Lady and--and holy fuck if he had to choose between saving Marinette and Ladybug, he would have chosen his Lady and, while he felt betrayed and lied to, he also felt like he let her down.

It took a couple minutes of Alya and Nino hugging a tearful Marinette before he was able to slip away to her bathroom. He leaned over the sink and looked at himself over in the mirror. A shuddering breath fell from his lips and Plagg floated out to look at him. Adrien looked at him helplessly.

“Did I really make her feel… like she was on a _pedestal_?” he asked, the word feeling like poison on his mouth.

The kwami looked apologetic. “You treated her like a hero,” he said softly, “when she’s just a teenage girl who was given some powers. Just like you get treated like a star, when you’re just a teenage boy who has some pictures of him taken.”

Adrien felt nausea rip through him and he closed his eyes. “Thank you, Plagg,” he murmured, “for being there all this time.”

Plagg floated back to his collar and gave a soft purr of comfort. “Anything for you, kitten.”

* * *

 

Late that night, Ladybug was racing across the roofs to their meeting point. Her eyes felt gritty from crying so much that day. Her throat still felt tight and her limbs felt like jelly. She knew that Tikki was supporting her more than she did on a usual night, but the kwami had told her before they had left that this was a necessary patrol and not to worry about testing her limits--she was miraculous, after all. It had caused them both to weakly laugh before the teen called for her transformation.

She saw him before he saw her. Her heart twisted with guilt for a moment--she never thought she would ever tell anyone before she told Chat, but it was something that had happened. Now, she paused as she landed behind him, she didn’t know what to say to him. Should she tell him that she had revealed herself to people today? She just watched him for a moment, as he hung his head from where he was perched.

Ladybug wouldn’t tell him tonight. He looked visibly down and she couldn’t add to his sadness.

“Hey there, Kitty,” she whispered as she approached him.

His shoulders tensed and he kept his face trained away from her. “Evening, Ladybug,” he responded, overly cordial. Chat Noir looked to the east. “I’ll take this direction. We’ll meet back up in an hour?” Despite it being presented as a question, he didn’t await a response before he took off in the direction he had indicated.

She watched him go and sighed, touching her earrings to draw comfort from Tikki for a moment. Whatever had upset her partner must have been something drastic. It upset her that there was something going on in his personal life that she couldn’t help with. Ladybug knew that she could help him--she could tell him who she was, but it would make everything worse.

A sigh fell from her lips and she turned the west. She would run her patrol and then try to soothe him after they met up again. She’d wait a while before she told him that she had let others know who she was before him.

It was just under an hour when she landed on the same rooftop. She let out a breath as she watched Chat sit in the same position as when she first saw him tonight. Ladybug walked up to him and stood close behind him, reaching out to touch his shoulder softly. “Chat, are you okay?” she asked him quietly.

His ears drew back against his head and his tail curled around his own leg. “It’s nothing, Bugaboo,” he answered back. “Just civilian stuff, you know?”

Ladybug frowned. “I know it’s civilian stuff but… We can talk if you want, Kitty. We don’t have to be specific.” She looked down for a moment at her feet and swallowed thickly. “You’re one of my best friends, Chat. I care about you and I want to help you anyway I can.”

Chat Noir closed his eyes tightly and turned around, startling her. He looked at her with distraught eyes and clenched his jaw tightly. “I don’t think you want that, Bug,” he said roughly, turning away from her again. “I just… don’t even know what to do anymore. I feel so torn. On one hand, I’m _so fucking hurt_ and the other hand I _hate what I’ve done_.” He breathed out loudly and curled his hand into a fist.

Ladybug felt her eyebrows draw up together and she squeezed his shoulder softly. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she started slowly, “but I doubt you could have done something too bad, Chat. You would never purposefully hurt anyone…”

He shrugged her off. “Of course it wasn’t on purpose but that--that doesn’t make any of it okay, Ladybug!” The hero furrowed his brow and looked over the city from where he stood. “It doesn’t make anything that happened today okay…”

Something had really upset her kitty today and she didn’t know what to say to make it better. “I’m sure everything will work out, Kitty,” she tried to soothe.

Chat turned to face her suddenly. “No it won’t!” he burst out. “None of this will be okay--Lady, I fucking--I did the one thing I promised myself I would never do to another person. I hated it so much I _promised I wouldn’t make another person feel like this_ and… and…” He scuffed his foot against the roof in frustration. His fingers curled into a tight fist and his hand trembled with the force.

She reached of his arm. “Hey, hey, Chat, it’s okay,” she tried to reason. “I’m sure it’s not that bad…”

“It is that bad, Ladybug,” he shouted. “I can’t _fucking believe_ I made you feel like that. Don’t you think I _hate_ being on a fucking pedestal too, Marinette?”

Her heart stopped and his eyes widened. She stumbled back from him and she stared at him. “W-what did you just call me?”

* * *

 

He blamed his bad luck and his emotional heart. It had to have been that lethal combination that led to Plagg detransforming him on the Paris rooftop. He had gone from an upset Chat Noir to a distraught Adrien Agreste standing in front of a pale, shocked Ladybug.

The two teens stood there on the roof, staring at each other in mutual levels of horror and distress. Things were so messed up between them right now and he didn’t even know where to start talking to her again, but he knew now was his turn to speak. So he breathed in deeply and tried to sort his thoughts.

Adrien wiped at his face and turned his face away from her. “I hate being the model son. I hate being the model. I _hate_ …” He let out a shuddering breath. “I _hate_ that you didn’t tell _me_ . I… I hate that you felt like I idolized Ladybug so much I didn’t care about Marinette. I’m sorry but I’m so _hurt_ too,” he continued. “We _promised_ … and-and…”

Suddenly Ladybug was Marinette and they were standing there watching each other. He looked away for a moment. There was still so much he had to say, but a lot of it he couldn’t hold onto. Just like his emotions earlier today, his thoughts were scattered all over the place and he felt like he was grasping at fading straws.

So he just kept trying to keep talking. “You were right,” he found himself saying, “about what you said earlier today. If I had to choose between Marinette and Ladybug, I would have saved Ladybug… but that’s because she’s important-- _you’re_ important, Marinette. Nothing can be fixed without you.” Adrien took a deep breath and swallowed thickly.

Her face looked like it was beginning to crumble into tears and he felt like he was being torn apart twice--once for hurting her and once for her hurting him. “You should ask our classmates one day what they think school would be like without you,” he told her softly. “I don’t know why you would ever think Marinette has to compete with Ladybug because you’re the same--you’re two halves of a whole.”

“A-Adrien… Chat...” She bit her lip and looked away. “I never wanted to hurt you… You’re my best friend. I-I…” Marinette wrapped her arms around herself. “I just want to be good enough for you… for everyone.”

He sighed and watched her for a moment. The same blue eyes, the same hair, and yet so different, but part of him found that so endearing--that, even under all the vulnerability, she was strong and brave. Adrien felt oddly proud of her because of it, but there were so many things they needed to work on now. “We… we clearly have some problems we need to talk about,” he said quietly. She nodded and rubbed at her eyes.

Releasing a soft breath, he reached out and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her into a hug. Her arms slid around his waist and she buried her face into his chest. Without prompting and in bright flashes of green and pink, Marinette and Adrien were gone and replaced with embracing Chat Noir and Ladybug.

“We’ll be okay,” he told her.

“We’re both better real than on pedestals,” she added softly as she drew back.

Chat smiled and tugged on one of her pigtails. “You got that right, Bugaboo.”


	2. Pedestals 2

They spent another few minutes with each other, in silence, on the roof. Ladybug didn’t know how to feel. She felt numb with the mountain of emotions threatening to fall down upon her. Deciding that she needed to focus on getting home, she pushed down her feelings and thoughts, into a corner of her mind. She would deal with them when she got home.

It was Chat who said goodnight first. He turned to look at her again and sighed, rubbing at the back of his neck. “I don’t know what we have to do to fix this, but I know we can,” he told her. “But it’s going to take a while. And we have to patient with each other.” The breath caught in her throat and she nodded silently, not trusting herself to talk. He clenched his jaw and shook his head. “We’ll--we’ll just give each other space for now. Work on akumas and then--then we should talk about what has happened,” he said softly. “Goodnight, Ladybug.”

She watched as he took off across the rooftops, heading a little to the left of where his house was. Then again, just because she knew didn’t mean that anyone else needed to.

Ladybug turned and ran towards her own home. She vaguely made sure that she swung around a few unnecessary blocks before she landed on her balcony. If she was honest, she couldn’t even remember where she had gone, but she relied on Tikki and muscle memory to get home. She fell through the balcony door and dropped her transformation almost the instant she landed.

An exhausted sigh fell from her lips and she closed her eyes, letting the doors close behind her. Then she opened her eyes. Her stomach rolled.

Her walls were littered with Adrien’s smiling face, hearts, and more.

A sob fell out of her mouth and she rushed forward. Not caring about the noise she made, she started ripping the pictures off the wall. Tears blurred her vision, but she knew where the pictures hung. Her drawers slammed open as she searched frantically for a bag. Once she found one, she started stuffing the photos into it, rubbing uselessly at her tears.

Tikki watched the carnage, buzzing sadly. “Marinette,” she called, flying closer to the distraught girl. “Marinette, calm down.” The girl only continued her destruction. Magazine ads were balled up and shoved into a bag, tape and torn corners left pinned up on her wall. She struggled with the calendar, sobbing. When it finally came off, it joined the photos.

Then the girl tore after her sketchbooks, flipping through pages and tearing out designs she had “made for him” while day dreaming. “Marinette!” Tikki cried, alarmed at her continuous destruction. “Marinette! Stop! Don’t get rid of your designs!” The kwami flew over to her and pulled on the girl’s hands to stop her.

“I _have to_ !” she sobbed, “I have to get rid of _everything_! Don’t you understand? Don’t you see that _I have done the same thing to him_!” Then the teen fell to the ground and covered her face, sobbing loudly, out of control. The kwami buzzed softly overhead, slowly sinking down to perch onto her head, patting her gently. “I made him feel like-like I didn’t _trust him_. I made him feel _terrible_ for putting me on a pedestal when, in reality, it w-was al-always _all_ m-my f-fault-t.”

Tikki frowned deeply. “Oh, Marinette, it’s not your fault. It’s okay--”

“You don’t understand!” Marinette wailed, choking on her sobs as she cried harder. “ _You-you don’t under-derstand w-what I’ve d-done_!” She slapped her hands over her mouth to try to reign in her sobbing, working to control her breaths through her nose. Her body shook with the force of her anguish. Every time she breathed in, her lungs seized and she coughed, choking on the snot and wet discharge she had accumulated from crying.

She was so exhausted. Marinette couldn’t move, her limbs heavy and useless. She couldn’t breathe, her lungs spasming with each breath she took, sobs still falling from her mouth. Her eyes couldn’t produce anymore tears. After revealing herself, what had happened with Adrien, and now, she didn’t think she would be able to cry for another year.

The last thing she was able to whimper to Tikki before falling asleep curled on the floor was “ _this is all my fault._ ”

* * *

 

“This is all my fault, Plagg,” Adrien said sadly, reaching up to remove the Ladybug posters the hung above his computer. “If I hadn’t worshiped her when she was Ladybug, she would have felt like she was able to come to Chat about having a hard time coping with being a superhero and she would have never revealed herself to Adrien, Nino, and Alya first.”

“If you say so, kid,” the kwami said, curled up on the pillow. “Far as I see it, you’re both a bunch of cheese-heads.”

Adrien rolled his eyes and sighed. “You just don’t _get it_ , Plagg,” he told him, voice quiet. “I promised myself I would _never_ do that to anyone. And I did it to the person that I _cherish the most_ . I betrayed the trust she put in me to care about _her_ and not her image.” He rolled up the posters and leaned the against the wall, planning on tossing them into the trash outside on his way out to the car tomorrow morning. With a few clicks of a button, the wallpaper on his computer was replaced with whimsical fanart of one of his favorite animes.

The boy sat in silence for a while until his kwami rose from the pillow and flew over to him. Adrien had his head in his hands, elbows propped up on the edge of his desk. His mind was racing because he didn’t know how to fix this. He didn’t even know if he could. Chat Noir was destruction, after all, bad luck incarnate.

“Do you think this is broken beyond repair?” he asked his kwami, voice tight and wet as he held back tears at the thought.

Plagg dropped into his collar and gave him a short nuzzle on the neck. “Kid,” he started quietly, “nothing is broken or destroyed. You two have some problems to work through, but you’re not the only Chat Noir and Ladybug to ever make mistakes or have issues.” He nudged the teen gently, knowing that, despite the effort, his words gave little solace to his distraught charge. The kwami flew away from Adrien and laid down on the pillow again.

For a few moments, he watched Adrien as he rubbed at his face, most likely trying to dry the tears before he had to acknowledge they existed. The bug girl really messed up, he decided, but the blame fell upon his boy too, for not recognizing the damage he was doing. That didn’t mean either of them should be as hurt and destroyed as they were by what happened, however. After silence dominated the room for a couple minutes, the kwami said something he had learned throughout the millennia he existed: “Sometimes, bad luck and bad things have to happen and exist for good luck and good things to be born and thrive.”

When Adrien looked up towards his kwami, he realized that he was already asleep. A soft smile touched his lips, the first, he thought, since learning Marinette was Ladybug, and it warmed him from the inside a little. “What a lazy cat,” he whispered to himself affectionately.

He leaned back in his chair and sighed. His eye was drawn to the first drawer of his desk and, after a moment of staring, he opened it. Reaching in, he pulled out the good luck charm Marinette had given him. Despite her odd behavior and him thinking that, maybe, she didn’t truly like him even after apologizing for the gum incident, he liked to think of her as his first friend. Not his best friend--a spot that slid between Ladybug and Nino fluidly depending on who he was and what he needed, but the first.

For a moment, he wondered what it would be like if he had fallen for Marinette first, if he hadn’t met Ladybug yet or just hadn’t been blinded by his affection for her. He entertained the idea of a world where telling Adrien before Chat was acceptable, wondered what his reaction would have been. Which was silly, he thought, because he was the bad luck cat. Not even all of Ladybug’s luck would have made him lucky enough to garner Marinette’s affections, her superhero identity aside.

He also wondered how he would face her in the morning. Ladybug sat behind him at school and, even if they hadn’t created the rift that now existed in between them, he would have had a hard time coping with that idea. She was someone he cared about deeply and, despite his hurt, he still loved her. Part of him felt wrong because of it, another felt wrong being upset with her, and he felt torn between the two sides.

How can one still love someone who hurt them? And how can one stay upset at someone they loved?

Adrien suddenly pushed away from his desk and stood, dropping the charm on the surface of the desk and shutting the drawer. “One day at a time,” he told himself, turning off the computer monitor. He exchanged his day clothes for his sleepwear and, as he climbed into bed and turned off the lights, he repeated the phrase to himself. “ _One day at a time_.”

* * *

 

Marinette didn’t sleep in that morning. She had slept fitfully on the floor and woken up hours before sunrise. After finding Tikki sleeping near her on some cloths that had spilled out of her sewing basket, she resumed cleaning her room and her journals of Adrien. Her eyes felt heavy, lined with dried, crusty tears; her tongue dry and thick in her mouth. Despite this, her face was stoic.

She didn’t pause, not even sparing a second glance at designs she had spent hours over. She combed through her computer, deleting pictures in mass and changing her wallpaper. By the time Tikki stirred awake, Marinette had a completely full garbage bag propped by her door and she was silently peeling the tape and torn edges from off of her wall. She wanted all evidence of this to be gone.

“Marinette,” the kwami called gently, flying over to her. “Marinette, are you okay?” The girl felt her eyes begin to well up with tears again and she briefly wondered how she even had the ability to still produce tears after everything she had cried yesterday. Without saying a word, fearing she’d choke on a sob, the girl just shook her head.

Tikki buzzed closer and nuzzled her cheek. “It’s going to be okay, Marinette,” she told the girl. “You two are Ladybug and Chat Noir, two halves of a whole. Everything will work out in the end.” The kwami looked sadly at the tear marks in her sketch journals. Marinette was a creator and seeing her destroy anything was jarring, but especially when it was her own work.

The kwami looked back to her charge and deflated when she realized her words did little to  console the girl. This was really a mess, she thought, and she blamed herself for a part since she had helped convince Marinette to tell her friends; Tikki was always the softer-hearted of the kwami pair when it came to the plight of her charges. Plagg had more of a “they will learn along the way; it’s a journey for them” point of view and she always felt the need to intervene and help when things got tough for them.

But too big of doses of good luck can go into the wrong places, despite all of her good intentions. She should know better by now, she thought, that too much of her good luck gave room for Plagg’s chaos to slip in. Despite her miraculous powers, she, too, was able to make mistakes. With a soft sigh, Tikki flew closer to Marinette and gave her a gentle nuzzle, holding in her luck so it didn’t seep into the girl. Hoping to give some sort of solace, she whispered her thoughts to the teen, “Too much good luck gives way to chaos, but, in the end, there will always be balance.”

Marinette reached up to cup Tikki in one hand, bringing her to the front of her face. She dropped a gentle, albeit trembling, kiss on the kwami’s head. “Thank you, Tikki,” she breathed, still fearful that speaking too loudly would cause her to burst out crying again. “I love you _so much_. Thank you.”

The kwami let out a twinkling giggle. “I love you too, Marinette. Now let’s get you ready for school. We don’t want your parents to think something is wrong.” A smile touched Marinette’s face and, for the first time since last night, she felt like she was going to be okay.

It took more makeup than she usually wore and about thirty minutes longer than a typical day for Marinette and Tikki to agree that she looked presentable to the public. Her hair pulled up in her signature pigtails, she clamored down the steps of her loft, carrying the bag of trash with her. Before she turned the corner into the kitchen, she quickly forced a smile on her face.

“Good morning, Marinette!” her mother called out from her place at the stove.

“Morning, Mama,” she responded, wincing a little when her voice came out quieter than normal.

Her mother turned around and rose her eyebrows in surprise. “What’s the with bag, sweetie? I thought you cleaned up after your friends left yesterday.” Marinette shifted uncomfortably under the studying gaze and she shrugged.

“Spring cleaning, Mama,” she offered weakly.

“At seven in the morning?”

She forced out a light laugh. “Well, you know how I get when I have an idea in my head,” she tried to explain. “I don’t stop until it’s done.” Marinette made her way towards the door. “I’m going to set this outside then I’ll come help you or Papa, okay, Mama?” With a nod from her mother, Marinette was down the stairs, breathing out a sigh of relief.

Tikki peaked out from her place in her bag. “You can’t hide _anything_ from parents, huh?” the teen asked, smiling ironically. The kwami laughed and tucked herself back into the purse as the teen entered the bakery. Thanking whatever good luck was on her side for her father being busy with a customer, she popped into the back and threw the bag into a dumpster.

Coming back inside, she saw her father was no longer busy. “Morning, Papa,” she greeted, leaning up and tugging on his arm a little for him to bend down far enough for her to peck his cheek.

He chuckled at this and smiled at her. “Good morning, Marinette,” he responded. “You look pretty today; is there a special occasion?” There was a teasing quality in his voice and twinkle in his eye that made Marinette blossom. In that moment, she was sure she was going to be okay.

“Sometimes girls just want to look especially pretty for no reason, Papa,” Marinette told him, her voice playfully scolding. He laughed and nodded, turning back to tend to the ovens and goods he was making.

“Well, ‘especially pretty girl,’” he teased, “go help your mother with breakfast today. I’m fine down here for the moment. If I need help, I’ll call.”

Marinette nodded and waved before she bounded back up the stairs to help her mother.

* * *

 

Adrien was awoken by the traditional knock on his door and Nathalie calling out to him that it was time for him to wake up. His head was throbbing and he let out a weak groan when he rolled out of bed, turning on the lights as he stood. From behind the door, he could hear Nathalie giving him how much time he had to get ready before he was expected downstairs for breakfast.

He pulled on his clothing, trying to make himself look presentable, even if he didn’t feel that way. After buttoning up his shirt, he entered the bathroom and visibly flinched when he looked his reflection in the mirror. He looked bad. His eyes were red-rimmed and swollen. There were blotches on his face and he could see his eyelashes stuck together with dried tears. Adrien snorted and shook his head. Of course he would look like shit. He was the bad luck cat, wasn’t he?

He spent a few minutes scrubbing at his face to try to rid the evidence of his emotional turmoil, but, in the end, he still looked just as bad. Giving up, he brushed his teeth and fixed his hair. He would ask Nathalie if he could have his makeup done. He always had a few minutes to spare before having to get to school and, after she saw the state he was in, she couldn’t very well refuse. Adrien had the Agreste name to live up to, after all.

For the first time ever, Plagg was compliant and didn’t complain when Adrien stuffed him into his pocket with some cheese. There weren’t even complaints about missing breakfast or being starving. This was his way of trying to make things easier for him, Adrien realized, and he was so very thankful.

Silently, he added extra cheese into his bag, along with his school books. He knew Plagg would recognize it as thanks.

Exhausted and feeling wholly unprepared to face the day, Adrien treaded down the stairs, carrying his Ladybug posters and promptly dropping them into the recycling as he entered the dining room. His breakfast awaited him, like normal, at the head of an empty table. His father was gone on business to Italy. He had expected this sight, but it still hurt. He wished he didn’t have to have breakfast alone.

As he took his seat and feebly began eating, he saw Nathalie enter the room, tapping away on her tablet. He perked up a little. He wasn’t completely alone. Nathalie wasn’t necessarily family, but she was sometimes the closest thing he had to it.

“Nathalie,” he called. She hummed in response, still typing away. “Do you think I have time to get my makeup done this morning?” he asked, his voice clearly hopeful.

She didn’t even look up from her tablet. “There’s no need,” she said, voice cold, “You don’t have a photoshoot today. Finish up your breakfast and be in the car by 7:15, please.” Then she left.

He felt his stomach drop and nausea ripped through him.

He couldn’t do this alone. He couldn’t face this emotional hell without help and the only people he had that could help him _didn’t care about him_.

Adrien suddenly breathed in sharply and squeezed his eyes shut, trying with all his might not to start crying again. He had cried enough last night. He couldn’t keep crying.

Plagg purred from his place in his jacket pocket and Adrien breathed out shakily. His hand slipped into the pocket and, still purring, Plagg nuzzled against him.

The boy didn’t finish eating--he didn’t think he could swallow with the lump of sadness stuck in his throat. With his hand tucked deep into his pocket, Plagg rubbing against his palm, purring as loud as he dared without getting caught, Adrien left for school early that day.

He didn’t know what he was going to do when he saw her. He wasn’t prepared, in any way. Even after arriving early, he loitered around the library, too nervous and upset to go into class. He was a coward that was afraid to look her in the face.

Plagg gave him strength and courage. If it hadn’t been for a surge of Chat that led him down the hall to his class, he was sure he would have hid the entire day in the library. The boy gave his kwami an affectionate pet along the top of his head, making a mental reminder to buy the finest cheese when he got home tonight as a thank you for everything Plagg was doing for him.

Despite the chaos that came with living with the god of destruction and bad luck, he loved the kwami more than he could ever explain.

The moment he saw her, he almost tripped on his own feet. _Okay, too much Chat from Plagg_ , he decided humorlessly, righting himself easily. She was seated behind where he was assigned, looking haggard and like she was wearing more makeup than what she usually did. At least he wasn’t the only one affected, he told himself, trying to draw comfort from the idea, but finding that it only upset him more.

Trying his best to avoid any eye contact with her, not that, thank god, she was even trying, he hurried to his seat. He almost tripped again and cursed his bad luck, but only briefly before calming down.

Adrien slumped into his chair the moment he was seated. He brought up his hands and rubbed at his eyes as he yawned. He was exhausted, his head hurt, and he knew he looked like shit. He didn’t want to be here. He didn’t want to face her, not yet, at least. But he was the bad luck cat, he thought sarcastically, as he caught a glimpse of Alya and Nino walking past him to sit down in their own seats. Trying to keep quiet, he let out a strained groan.

“ _Shit_ , dude,” Nino suddenly said, shaking his shoulder a little, making the model look up, slightly annoyed. “You like like _total shit_ ,” the DJ whispered, leaning closer to him. “What happened last night? Was it your dad again?”

He forced a weak smile on his face, feeling guilty for worrying his friend, even if it was a founded worry. “No,” he told him. “It’s nothing like that. I just…” He paused, trying to think of a believable lie for why he looked as terrible as he did. “I just stayed up too late watching anime. You know how I get sometimes.” He tried to laugh at the statement, but he felt it was unconvincing, especially with the way Nino was still looking at him, skeptical and studying.

“You’re a _dork._ ”

The statement was startling. Perhaps said a little louder than what it was meant to be, but Adrien knew how nervous Marinette could get sometimes. When he turned to look at her, her face was flushing different shades of pinks and reds--and she looked utterly mortified that she had said it out loud. With his gaze on her, he watched as her face morphed from humiliation to, while still flushed, determined. For the first time since finding out, he saw spots without the Miraculous.

“You’re smart and talented when it comes to school, but at the end of the day,” she said, tone teetering somewhere between feigned nonchalance and hysteria, “you’re just a major anime dork, aren’t you?” She was trying. Maybe that wasn’t her initial intention when she showed up to school today, but she was recovering from her verbal blunder and trying to reach out to him, to mend the divide between him.

She was being strong when he needed her to be, he realized, and it felt like his heart bloomed in his chest in that moment.

Adrien rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly and ducked his head to the side a little. “I’m totally guilty,” he admitted, glad that the words didn’t sound as awkward as he felt they did.

Marinette forced an awkward smile. They were saved by any further interaction by the teacher entering the class and calling for their attention.

* * *

 

 _Oh my god what was she thinking?!_ ‘You’re a dork?!’ Where did that come from? Why had she said that out loud? God, Marinette just wanted to _erupt into flames and die_. She was so lucky Alya had only just sat down and was still going over posts from the Ladyblog or else she would _never hear the end of it_.

She was so thankful to Adrien, though. Despite her verbal blunder, and her sorry excuse to try to use it to reach out to him, he had responded to her. It wasn’t easy, or even good, but it was a start.

Maybe they could do this.

She was so wrong.

Lunch was an obstacle she hadn’t seen coming. Alya had yanked Nino away from Adrien, guilt written on her face even as she gave what Marinette was certain was a lie about needing him for some Ladyblog formatting help. The hero would have been inclined to believe her journalist friend if she hadn’t seen her dragging her boyfriend off to a cafe down the road from the school instead of the library.

Adrien and Marinette stared at each other in silence. Her heart was somersaulting and she felt it rise to her throat. Either that or it was her about to puke, she thought humorlessly. Last year, Adrien had managed to convince his father to let him have lunch with his classmates half the week. Today was one of the days he was allowed to stay during the lunch hours.

He suddenly shifted on his feet, drawing his bag closer to him. Her eyes followed the movement and she wondered if his kwami was in there. She mimicked the movement unconsciously, watching his eyes zero onto her bag as well, and she wondered if he was having the same thoughts.

They were just standing in the hall, in awkward silence. She winced a little at the thought. They had been better than this lately, before her reveal. It had taken a long time for her to be able to have a conversation by herself with Adrien, despite her crush. Marinette still got tongue-tied sometimes, but they were much better friends in the recent months than they had been when they first met.

It felt like they were strangers again. Even though they knew each other better now than they perhaps ever had at any point before, they felt like strangers and it was all her fault.

That was when Rose came buzzing by. As if she knew something was wrong, the kind girl had extended an invitation for Adrien and Marinette to join her and Juleka for lunch with Nathanael. They both extended a look towards each other and, with a silent agreement that was far too Chat and Ladybug like for her comfort, they followed the pixie-like girl to a table in the library.

Marinette sat near Nathanael while Adrien took Juleka’s other side, her right being occupied by Rose, who was chatting excitedly about an assignment she had gotten in one of her classes. They didn’t look at each other for the rest of the lunch period.

In uncomfortable silence, they accompanied each other to their next class, sitting in their respective seats. Once at her desk, Marinette let out a sigh and pressed her cheek against the cool surface of the table.

She really fucked up everything, didn’t she?

“ _Girl!”_ Alya exclaimed excitedly as she plopped down in the seat next to her. “Look what I have!” She pulled a magazine from her bag and waved it in Marinette’s face, whose face blanched when she realized it was Agreste’s new spread, featuring Adrien on the cover. A polite smiled forced its way on her face as she took it gingerly from her best friend.

“Ah, thanks, Alya,” she said, trying not to wince as her voice fell sharply below the enthusiasm she knew she usually exhibited. “I was actually looking forward to Agnes B’s spring shoot, though…” When she looked up and saw the confusion on the reporter’s face she panicked. “I just think Gabriel Agreste is too cold for spring! It’s a time for brighter colors and adventurous matching and--and he still uses dark colors, _that’s all_!” It came out a tad louder and quicker than she had anticipated and she winced when Adrien’s head turned to look at her.

A smile tugged at his lips and he gave her a curious half-grin. “I think my father considers white to be the only acceptable ‘bright’ color,” he agreed. He was trying too, and that made her feel so much better. Her posture immediately began to relax and she felt herself smiling a little and nodding, more to convey her thanks than her agreement.

Ladybug was strong, but right now she was only Marinette and she didn’t think she could handle having to deal with their problems at school as well, especially after the awful lunch they had just had.

“If you ask me,” he continued, voice lowered like he was telling a secret, “I think red and black looks much better than white and black do-- _any day of the year_.”

Marinette couldn’t even stop the laugh that erupted from her in that moment. She leaned forward in her seat a little and, in a equally low voice, replied, “I think I rather prefer _green and black_.” Her heart warmed when his smile broke out in full force. They were getting better. It made her feel like she could breathe for the first time that day.

“Dupain-Cheng! Agreste!” The teens quickly sat properly in their seats and faced their teacher, who had a slightly annoyed look on her face. “You just came back from break; please keep conversations to the halls, not when I’m teaching.”

“Sorry, Mrs. Moreau!” they both echoed in unison. When she resumed teaching, they snuck a glance at each other and laughed quietly under their breaths.

Okay, now she was sure that they could do this.

They were Ladybug and Chat Noir, after all.

* * *

 

They met for patrol again that night. They didn’t need to, but, after having the day they had at school today, they both felt drawn to each other. It was fixable, they both realized earlier that day. They weren’t destroyed beyond repair.

Instead of splitting up to cover more ground, like they usually did, they silently came to the agreement that they needed to be with each other. It would add another hour to their patrol, but it would be worth it. They needed to get back into the rhythm of being partners, even after what had happened.

As the flew across the night sky, Ladybug found herself staring at Chat Noir. Her guilt about her behavior regarding Adrien was still eating her alive. She had felt better throughout the day and, when she had came home to a blank room, she had felt good. Seeing him now, however, and knowing that he didn’t know of the terrible things she had done to him--it was tearing her apart.

She had to tell him. She couldn’t live with herself he had continued to go through his life thinking he was the only one to do that in their relationship--their partnership. They had just finished their last block when she suddenly stopped on a rooftop, her heart squeezing tightly.

Knowing Chat, he probably blamed this all on himself. And it wasn’t his fault. She was at fault too. She did wrong too.

Chat Noir heard her stop, heard her strangled breathing and moved close to her. “Ladybug?” he asked gently, reaching out towards her, but not touching her. He probably didn’t know if they were ready for that yet. She didn’t know if they were ready for that either. They were better today than they had been last night, yes, but they weren’t perfect. This semblance of ‘okay’ they had was still fragile. His touch, and her words, would likely shatter it.

Ladybug looked up into his green eyes and turned to face the skyline sharply, clasping her hands together tightly. She couldn’t _not_ tell him. That was as bad as lying. She was better than that. Ladybug was better than that, but so was Marinette. Ladybug was the strong one though--so she had to do it now.

“I need to tell you the truth,” she suddenly blurted. Not looking at him, fearing she would freeze at the look on his face, she rushed through her words, “I just--Chat Noir always made it really clear that he loved Ladybug, so I know you have feeling for her. I just think it’s fair that you know Marinette has a massive crush on Adrien.” Once she finished, she glanced up and winced at the look of confusion on his face. “And Marinette is guilty of idolizing Adrien, too.” Confusion slid into discomfort and she felt her heart ache.

Chat Noir suddenly stepped back a few steps. He forced out a laugh, which sounded bitter, and shook his head. “Fell in love with the _‘perfect’_ side, huh?” he asked, not even trying to hide the jaded tone he had. His fist was curled as he looked away from her and down the street.

She flinched and crossed her arms over her stomach. “It didn’t start like that,” she told him, voice quiet, “but it was definitely part of it.” Ladybug could feel him staring at her, but she didn’t look to met his gaze. “I hated you the first time I met you, remember?” She paused for a beat then continued, “Then you apologized to me and gave me your umbrella. You did nothing wrong and you _apologized_ anyway. I was so mean and rude to you and, instead of hating me for it, you sought me out and had _compassion_ for me. You didn’t have to.”

He didn’t respond, but she saw him shift his posture from the corner of her eye. She pushed on. “Sometimes I wondered if I would have fallen in love with Chat Noir if I had met him first, or wasn’t blinded by Adrien,” she admitted quietly. “Chat Noir is a big dork, but he’s my best friend and I do love him. More often than not, I was repelled by him because I was under the impression he flirted with everyone--that he wasn’t serious with Ladybug.” She laughed a little. “You called me ‘My Lady’ one second, then called me ‘Princess’ the next when I was a different person.” Silence rang on the rooftop.

“Wishful thinking is _stupid_ though,” she whispered. “Because I can never go into the past and change what I did. I can’t unlove Adrien, just like I can’t unreveal myself to you three. And I feel like everything is such a _tangled mess_ and I don’t even know where to _start_ to unravel it, but I knew I needed to tell you the truth.” She took in a deep breath. “I put you on a pedestal too--and _I hate myself for it_.”

* * *

 

He was staring at her. Chat could see the sheen of unshed tears behind the mask and he felt his heart slam against his ribcage. Marinette had loved Adrien, probably still did, if she was anything like he was with his love for Ladybug. Fuck, they were messed up, weren’t they? Dancing around each other, loving one half and being oblivious of the other for almost two years now.

How do you even go about fixing something as screwed up as that?

Chat had to try, though, he knew. She was falling apart and, while he knew she could be strong, she wasn’t perfect. Ladybug proved to him more than enough in the past two days that she was just as human as he was. He had to be strong for her too, because she couldn’t do this by herself.

She could have lied to him and never told him about idolizing Adrien, he realized. Ladybug could have kept it a secret from him for the rest of their lives but, instead, she admitted to her faults as well. Despite the pain he felt, he was proud and thankful for that too. They had both made mistakes.

He wished he could start all over.

Suddenly his ears popped up and he laughed a little to himself. Ladybug’s head shot up and she shot him a confused look. Despite the watery aspect of his eyes, his smile was easy-going, the first since Marinette’s reveal. He knew what he could do.

His hand appeared, palm up, in front of her. Face still confused, she placed her hand in his and he pulled her close to him, extending his baton. “I have a stupid idea,” he announced, grin still stupidly wide.

Her eyebrows knitted together. “Uh, what?” she stammered. “Kitty--”

Without warning, he tightened his hold around her waist and swung them over the edge of the building. A gasp of surprise sounded in his ear as she gripped his arm tightly and he found himself laughing. “Just trust me, Bug,” he told her, “I’ve got you.”

Ladybug’s grip tightened on his arm and she shifted so that she was settled more against his side. “I _do_ trust you,” she whispered, voice broken. “I trust you _more than anything_ , Chat.” He felt his heart warm for a moment and he gave her a soft smile before catching the side of a building with his baton, propelling them further down the street.

After a few minutes, he lowered them to the ground and unwrapped his arm from around her waist. She stared up at him and gaped when he dropped his transformation. A quick glance around told her that she was in a dimmed alley way and she visibly relaxed. Without her saying anything, and, by the look on her face, to her surprise, her kwami dropped her transformation as well.

Adrien, with Plagg resting on his shoulder, faced Marinette, as Tikki hovered over her head.

His hand was held out to her again, open-palmed again, but held at its side. His smile widened as her face grew more confused.

“My name is Adrien Agreste,” he started. “I double as Chat Noir, half of a superhero group, when needed. I love anime too much for my health and I hate modeling.” He paused and, when jabbed by his kwami, added hurriedly, “Oh, yeah, this is my kwami, Plagg. He turns me into Chat Noir.”

The hope that lit up her face healed most of the wounds on his heart in that moment. She looked so relieved and happy--her eyes shone with tears, but it didn’t upset him; they were good tears.

Marinette took his hand and shook it firmly.

“My name is Marinette Dupain-Cheng,” she echoed. “I double as Ladybug, the partner of Chat Noir, when needed. My kwami is Tikki. I want to be a designer when I grow up and I hate bullies.”

Despite the damp, dark alley surrounding them, they both felt their worlds shine when they smiled at each other.

* * *

 

_Three months later_

 

They were all laughing, sprawled out on a picnic blanket in the park. Nino curled against Alya’s side, arm around her shoulders as he guffawed into her neck. Marinette, in a pink polka-dotted summer dress, sitting cross-legged next to them, playing with uprooted wildflowers in her lap, her cheeks flushed from giggling. All three of them laughing at a story Alya had just told them about a case of bad investigating that journalism club had gotten itself into. Adrien hadn't heard it over the roaring of his heartbeat in his ears. He knew he was working himself up into a panic attack, but he still struggled trying to reign in his breathing. Plagg in his collar was getting annoyingly restless. Then, Marinette looked up at him and gave him an encouraging smile, nodding her head.

Fingers curled tightly into fists, he weakly gave one back. _You can do this_ , he told himself. _You’re not alone._

He cleared his throat. Nino’s and Alya’s full-bodied laughter died away as their gazes swung over to him. Adrien squirmed a little under their studying looks. A frown marred Nino’s face as he sat up. “What’s up, bro?” he asked, worry coloring his voice. “Are you okay?”

The hero looked down to his hand and idly twisted the ring on his finger. “I have something to tell you guys,” he said solemnly. “But you can’t ask questions. And you can’t tell _anyone_.” He flushed a little when he realized he was echoing Marinette from three months ago.

Swallowing thickly, he made to stand up when, suddenly, Nino shook his head and laughed a little. “No need, dude,” he said, snorting a little. “We know.”

There was silence for a beat.

“ _What?_ ”

Leave it to Ladybug-- _Marinette_ \--to react first. The confession was still echoing in Adrien’s mind as he stared at his best friend, who was casually laying back down with his girlfriend.

“You _know_?” he finally echoed, eyebrows drawing together.

Alya snorted and rolled her eyes. “You weren’t exactly subtle when Marinette revealed herself, Cool Cat,” she supplied.

Nino shrugged and pulled her close. “Yeah,” he agreed. “You were basically screaming ‘hello this is me, _Chat Noir_ , this is my secret identity.’” When he and Alya looked up to see the looks of shock and disbelief on the superhero duo’s faces, they both burst into uproarious laughter. It was the only sound nearby for a couple minutes until they hiccuped into silence, wiping tears from their eyes.

Adrien looked uncomfortable as he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. In that moment, Nino took pity on him and sobered up. “We had suspicions, but it was honestly the behavior you two had around each other after that really sealed the deal for us, y’know?” he explained. “You could hardly look at each other or talk to each other the day after. Both of you looked crushed.”

Alya nodded. “You looked like your lives were over,” she said softly, voice sad. “We didn’t know what to do. Or how to help. We didn’t even know if we could.” She smiled bitterly. “We’re not even supposed to know. How could we help?”

The four friends stared at each other in silence. The two heroes were still clearly mulling over the information that they had just received, Adrien’s face flushing a little at the thought that he had been obvious enough for Alya and Nino to find out his identity. He would have to be more careful about that in the future, he decided.

“We’re glad you two worked it out,” Nino said after a few minutes. “We were really worried about you two. Not just Chat Noir and Ladybug, but Marinette and Adrien.” Alya agreed soberly, her face pinched with leftover concern. “But hey!” he exclaimed suddenly, drawing Alya’s and Adrien’s attention. “We have two badass superheroes in this group--and now that we ‘officially’ know, Alya and I can be your trusty sidekicks.”

“ _Oh my god,_ ” Marinette suddenly shrieked, voice horrified. All three snapped their heads to look at her, just catching her _literally slapping her face_ as she facepalmed, cheeks glowing. “ _Oh my god._ ” Puzzled looks were shared as she flopped forward and buried her face into the blanket, groaning loudly. “ _Alya drew you as Chat Noir when we were fifteen!_ ” she practically screamed into her mouthful of cloth, making it just barely audible to her friends.

Alya and Nino immediately started cackling, falling back with each other. Adrien, while still confused, was mildly amused by the situation. “ _Alya drew Adrien as Chat and I called her crazy!_ ” With that, he also fell forward laughing. Tears clung to his eyes as his stomach ached and his lungs screamed for air. But he still laughed. After swallowing her humiliation, Marinette joined in. The Parisian park was filled with outrageous teenage laughter for a few precious minutes.

They were far from perfect.

They still had a lot to talk about in the future.

Mostly regarding the fact that they had been in love with each other and that they, after spending the last three months repairing their relationship and being nearly inseparable, were likely falling in love all over again with each other, properly this time.

But Marinette and Adrien were going to be alright.

_They were Ladybug and Chat Noir, after all._


End file.
